Self-acceptance always seems to come with conditions.
We tell ourselves: “I’ll only be able to accept myself when I’m thin and beautiful”; ”I’ll like myself when I’m perfect.”; ”I’ll be good enough when I’m going to a top college, when I’m working at my dream job, and making a lot of money.”; ”I’ll accept myself when I’m in a relationship and find someone who loves me.”
And so we wait and wait, putting our happiness on the back burner.
The problem with conditions however is that they’re often unrealistic and unobtainable.
If we put our lives on hold trying to achieve them, we’ll be waiting for self-acceptance for forever.
The truth is that who you are in this moment, is good enough.
Placing judgement on yourself doesn’t help you move forward, and it doesn’t feel very good—all it does keeps you stuck.
You need to know that there is nothing wrong with who you are.
There are no set rules dictating what makes a person acceptable or worthy.
Everyone is unique and NO ONE is perfect.
You aren’t good or bad or better or worse than anyone else—you’re just different.
And it’s that differentness that adds to the beauty and diversity of life.
Self-acceptance isn’t about getting to a certain place or meeting a standard. It’s about letting go of who you think you should be, and giving yourself permission to be exactly who you are.
You find self-acceptance when you realize that making mistakes and having flaws doesn’t make you a failure—it makes you human.
It takes recognizing that your self-worth isn’t something you earn, but something inherent.
As a living, breathing, human being who inhabits this earth, you have value.
You exist, and therefore you matter.
You find self-acceptance when you stop comparing yourself to others, by recognizing that as a unique human being, there is nothing to compare.
You have an individual set of strengths and talents and insights. You have things to offer this world that no one else can share. These things are what make you special. They make you important, and they make you irreplaceable.
There will always be someone smarter or less intelligent than you.
Someone thinner or larger than you.
Someone richer or poorer than you.
Someone more talented or less skilled.
But there will never be another you.
Your individuality isn’t something to be ashamed of—it’s something to embrace and celebrate.
You find self-acceptance when you let go of self-doubt and start believing in yourself.
You find it when you stop seeking perfection and start working towards progress and growth.
You find it when you recognize that life is filled with ups and downs, and that just because you slip and fall doesn’t mean you can’t get back up and try again.
You find it when you stop fixating on all the things that could go wrong, and start holding onto all the things that could go right.
Finding self-acceptance may not be easy, but it is possible.
It’s a process, and a long one. It takes time, patience, and constantly challenging the thoughts telling you that you aren’t good enough. It takes recognizing that you are deserving of the same kindness, love, and acceptance you give so freely to everyone else.
You are not an exception.
You have infinite self-worth.
You always have, and you always will.
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About The Movement:
My name is Daniell, and I am the creator of the Internal Acceptance Movement (I. A.M.)
Need support? Have a question?
The Internal Acceptance Movement is an online space that advocates self-acceptance, healthy body image, recovery from self-destructive behaviors and addictions, and the acceptance of all people, regardless of what they look like, who they identify as, what they have been through, and where they come from. I. A.M. is a space that offers support to those battling their inner demons and strength to continue fighting when all hope seems to be gone.
I. A.M. represents the idea that as human beings, we aren't defined by anything external, such as our weight, appearance, body shape, gender, sexuality, ethnicity, clothing choices, income, occupation, or background. But that instead, it's our internal qualities--our character and attitude, our passions and dreams, our soul and spirit, our heart and capacity to love, our goals and morals, and the way in which we treat others--that are truly self defining.
Whether you're battling an eating disorder, self-harm, alcoholism, drug addiction, depression, PTSD, low self-esteem, anxiety, self-hating thoughts, poor body image, or any other mental health condition or self-destructive behavior, I. A.M. exists to remind you that you are NOT alone in how you feel or what you're going through; that it's okay to not be okay, and that you don't have to face this pain alone; that things can and will get better; that healing and recovery are possible; that there is nothing wrong with who you are; the who you are is enough; and that you are deserving of happiness, love, and acceptance, always.
I'm here if you need me: whether it's support, someone to vent to, a question, or you just want to say hi--know that this is a safe place and that you aren't alone. If I don't respond immediately, know that I'm not ignoring you. I will message you back at my earliest convenience. If you have an emergency or feel that you want to hurt yourself, please, please call 911. I'm not a therapist or a mental health professional of any kind. If you're in danger, you need to ask for help from people who can adequately support you. Sending you love: Daniell